Shopping At EdgeMart
by Adrastia
Summary: Kadaj, Yazoo and Loz are going grocery shopping. They have a strict budget to stick to. But we all know how hard that is.


**Author's Note:** This is actually a new one. Freshly written. I don't know what brought this on. Maybe because I hate shopping? Such a drag. And I have no choice but to shop at Walmart, which is what EdgeMart is based on. Although EdgeMart is an incarnation of Wall Market Mart, which would be a Walmart in Wall Market. But I don't think I used that one in anything that wasn't just shared between friends. I can't remember. Anyway, think Walmart.

I couldn't think of a title. The working title was "Toys And Snacks" and was never meant to be permanent. "Shopping At EdgeMart" might be plain, but it's fitting. I have a lot of titling issues, you see. :P

This is just meant to be cute and funny. I'm also on a budget. So I feel Loz's pain. I want video games too. ;_;

* * *

"Put it back," Kadaj said through clenched teeth. "Right now".

"But that's not fair!" Loz pouted.

"We had a deal. One toy every three weeks. That's how our turns are supposed to work. Everyone gets a week."

"Well be more generous!" Loz insisted, clutching the video game to his chest.

"Now brother, you know that isn't fair. You are hogging all of the extra money we saved up that we are supposed to share evenly between us. We agreed on taking weekly turns. It's Yazoo's week now. I already gave you my last one because you started crying in the store. That means you have had two weeks in a row already."

"You can play too!" Loz insisted. "I won't hog the game. I promise."

"I don't like video games," Kadaj stated flatly. "You know that. Now no more toys."

"Video games aren't toys!" Loz cried.

"Do you play with them?" Kadaj asked.

"Well... Yeah."

"Then they're toys. Now put it back. We have more important things to shop for. We need to stick to the list. Otherwise we won't be able to pay our bills and still have extra money to have fun with. You understand that right?"

Loz looked offended. "Jeez Kadaj, I'm not stupid!"

The youngest brother laughed. "I wonder..."

Before Loz could respond Yazoo had come back to the shopping cart with a package of bacon. "I don't know why Loz likes this stuff. It's so greasy and fatty."

"Only one package?" The eldest brother pouted, holding the video game he still hadn't put back. "I'll eat that all up in one sitting."

Yazoo sighed, annoyed. He hated shopping with Loz so much. He wished he'd stay at home. But he was so handy for carrying heavy packages. They had chose to walk today in order to save money. "Loz, it's not on sale this week. And our rent is due on Thursday. Plus I'm out of shampoo and it's my turn to have a luxury item. So put back that video game so I can have the expensive brand this time."

Loz looked at the game and then at Yazoo. "But..."

"Loz...," Yazoo scolded.

The eldest brother's lip began to tremble. "Please?"

Kadaj sighed in annoyance. Loz was going to start crying in public over a video game. He really didn't want to go through this again. People were already starting to stare and they all attracted enough attention as is. Kadaj turned to Yazoo. "It's your call."

Yazoo ran his fingers through his hair. "Do you want me to have a bad hair day Loz?"

Loz shook his head. "Well no..."

"I'd be pretty upset if I had to show up to work with frizzy hair."

Loz nodded in agreement. "That's true."

"You want me to look beautiful don't you, Loz?"

The eldest brother nodded. It would be terrible if Yazoo didn't look good. He knew this. He also knew that if Yazoo didn't look good he'd be miserable and impossible to deal with and that was what Yazoo was really getting at here. Loz was not as dense as people took him for.

"Now Loz, don't cry. There are dozens of copies of that video game on the shelves right now. And I'm sure there are plenty more in the back. It will still be here next week. And if we only buy one package of bacon and store brand snacks then I'm sure that next week we'll have enough to buy what you want without a problem."

"Alright Yaz," Loz agreed. "I understand. I'll put it back so you can have nice hair."

As Loz was walking back to the video game section Kadaj turned to Yazoo looking relieved. "Thank God! I thought everyone in EdgeMart would be laughing at us. You're so much better at dealing with him. That's why I prefer to leave it to you."

"Well I do have the golden touch with Loz," the middle brother replied. "I'd let him have the game already. But I hate store brand shampoo and on my last turn I had to get more conditioner. It's such a burden being so breathtaking."

Kadaj rolled his eyes. These two would be the death of him.

The three brothers continued their shopping trip. At first they stuck to the list. But then Loz started to add to it when Kadaj excused himself to go to the bathroom. Yazoo had simply turned around to get a loaf of bread from the shelf and the next thing he knew there were three cases of soda in the cart.

"Put two of those back," Yazoo ordered. "Hurry. Before Kadaj comes back from the bathroom. I promise I won't say a thing if you do it right now."

"But it's store brand just like you said!" Loz protested.

"Three cases worth? We might as well buy one case of the most expensive brand then. Put two of them back right now."

"But Yaz!" Loz whined.

Yazoo just folded his arms and shook his head.

"You know," Loz began. "You never even said how much I could get. Just that it had to be store brand. So it's your fault. Not mine."

"Well, you do have a point there...," Yazoo agreed. "I'm sorry. I should have been more specific."

Loz smiled widely. "Then I can have all three cases?"

"No you can't. Please put two back. We can't afford three cases of soda this week. Even if it's store brand."

The eldest brother sighed. "Then how about if we put something else back to make up for it? And yes, Yaz, I can do math! I understand the concept of a budget. And I am **not** crying!"

Yazoo flinched. That little tirade surprised him. "I never said-"

"Well you would have so I jumped ahead," Loz interrupted, smiling. He was pleased with himself. "See? I'm not as dumb as you guys think."

"Alright, alright," Yazoo relented. I get it. "We'll work something out. But only for one extra case of soda."

Loz began rooting through the shopping cart looking for things he put back in order to get more soda. There were plenty of things in here that he didn't like or didn't think were necessary. Finally, he pulled out a six pack of plain yogurt. "This is gross. It's so sour and there's no fruit in it. Who would want plain yogurt anyway?"

Yazoo grabbed the yogurt from his brother's hand. "I want plain yogurt. That's mine and I am certainly not exchanging it for soda."

Loz sighed. "Fine. How about this then?"

"That's Kadaj's favorite cereal," Yazoo said, shaking his head. "There's no way he'll part with that."

Loz sighed again. This was hard. "Well umm... Hey! How about this?"

"We can't put back the sugar."

"But soda already has sugar in it," Loz said.

"Yes, but what about all of the things that we need sugar for?"

"Oh yeah," Loz remembered. "I forgot about that. Then how about we put back-"

"How about we put back some of your snacks so you can have two cases of soda?" Yazoo suggested. "You have so many and you're the one who wants extra soda."

"No way! I am not doing that!" Loz pouted.

"You're getting loud!" Yazoo scolded in a voice just as loud as his brother's. "People are staring. Someone will call security if you don't calm down. How are we supposed to prove ourselves to everyone if you keep drawing negative attention?"

"But Yaz"-

"But Loz-"

* * *

"Why do these stores have to be so big?" Kadaj muttered to himself as he made his way back from a bathroom that was located all the way on the other side of EdgeMart. "Who knows what they're up to now."

He wasn't even halfway back when he heard the commotion. When he reached his brothers it was quite a scene. Groceries had been tossed all over the floor and haphazardly stuffed onto nearby shelves. And Loz and Yazoo were loudly arguing over a single can of peas.

Kadaj tiredly rubbed his forehead. "Yes. These two will certainly be the death of me."

 _~Fin~_


End file.
